Geeky Candles Co: Game of Thrones. Series 4: Episode 1.

So I finally got around to feasting my eyes on the brand spanking new episode of Game of Thrones. Which I'm sure you don't need telling is the long awaited Season opener of Series 4. I'm going to give you a run down of the main plot points as quickly as I can, so if you don't want spoilers - get outta here!

In order of play:

1. The episode opened with a swordsmith creating two new swords made from Valerian steel. Tywin Lannister gave one to Jamie. Tywin wanted Jamie to go back home to Casterly Rock and Jamie wanted to start back at his old job as head of the King's Guard. Surprisingly perhaps the 40 year old won out (Jamie's age is mentioned as an insult twice in the show once by Tywin an once by Joffrey who mocked Jamie's ability to protect anyone since he only has one hand).

2. Tyrion waits at the city's edge to greet Dornish Prince Oberyn Martell, who as it turns out is already in King's Landing. Where you might ask? The whorehouse (Littlefinger's).

3. We get an extended scene in said whorehouse. Nakedness and a stabbing ensues. We were also introduced to Odin's 'paramore' Ellaria Sand.

Prince Oberyn tells Tyrion that, "The Lannister's aren't the only ones who pay their debts." making it clear that he is present for more than just the Wedding of Joffers and Marge.

4. Dany realises that her dragons are not her 'babies' and cannot be controlled.

And the new Daario Naharis and less new Greyworm decide to have a pissing contest.

5. Sansa won't eat anything. Tyrion and Shae try to convince her but she is kinda depressed cause, oh I don't know her family just got brutally murdered. Then Shae attempts to seduce Tyrion but he rebuffs her claiming that things are too 'tense'.

6. Jamie gets a gold hand and a cold shoulder. Cersei and Jamie finally have a sit-down but to neither's satisfaction. Jamie believes she has been having it off with the Doctor. Cersei says it's because he 'took too long to come back'.

7. The Wildings/Wildlings joined up with some more Wildlings led by Thenn. Ygritte holds an arrow to his throat before backing down. Then the new Wildlings sent by Mance spitroast an arm off a 'Crow'.

8. Jon Snow doesn't get executed.

9. Brienne tells Margery Tyrell that it was Stanis who killed Renly and she will not rest until she has sought vengenance.

10. Joffrey is a shit head.

11. Daario Naharis gives Dany some flowers (a beautiful blue rose amongt them) and she takes them but she should have thrown them on the ground and trampled on them. The slave army is called to halt by a dead woman/girl on a cross, Ser Jorah tells her that there is a woman hung on a cross at every milemarker between here and eternity (okay he didn't say that but I can't remember the name of the place - so sue me) and Dany reminds Jorah she is not a child and that instead of burying all of the 163 more bodies before her gentle heart can see them she wants to look upon each of their faces.

12. 2nd BEST Scene of the Episode. Jamie and Brienne get together for a catch-up (all they need is a Starbuck's and they would be set). Brienne reminds Jamie that he vowed (to the very dead Catelyn Stark) to protect Sansa but he claims that she is safest exactly where she is (very true I might add, at least for now).

^ That is exactly what I thought!

13. Sweet moment when the Soldier turned Court Jester whose life Sansa saved on Joffrey's name-day (last season) gives Sansa his Mother's necklace as a token of his gratitude.

14. BEST scene of the episode.
Whilst on her travels with The Hound, Arya recognises one of the men who stole her sword - 'Needle' and killed her friend Lommy (last season). After chatting to him for a while, things take a nasty turn and The Hound and Arya go to town slicing and dicing all the King's men. The icing on the cake is when Arya gets to stick 'Needle' through the neck of the evil bastard who killed her friend.